It’s always the same.

Something’s never change, that’s a fact. However much good I try to do for other people, however much I try to be there for people, however much I try to CARE for other people its always the same. In that I never even get the tiniest gratitude for my efforts in all that I do. But you know what’s hit me the hardest? when im in a shitty mood and nobody even wants to give me the time of day. That’s not my problem. It’s when those people who said they will be there for you are those people who aren’t living up to the mark. I get that they have they have their own lives and potentially their own problems, but don’t say something you can’t stick to. These are the people who at a moment’s notice ill jump at the opportunity to help anyone, regardless how dire my own situation is. It would be easy to just become like everyone else, no disregard for anyone but myself, but that’s not me and it never will be. Because in helping others, I self contentiously help myself. I suppose that is my reward, its not a lot in a sense of helping me in my time of need, but it helps me to be there person I am now and am becoming. Maybe one day people will appreciate me for what I do and give as much as they take, maybe.

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